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 Sunday, January 29

Papa

After the major row with Papa yesterday, questions I asked myself. Am I self-righteous? Am I delusional? Am I devoid of love? Am I judgemental? Am I selfish?. I felt that ever since I converted, things just turned out sour and unhappy between me and Pa. The remembered oaths I ejaculated yesterday make me cringe. How could I promise to comply to him just for the sake of complying? I used to genuinely proclaim that I fret nothing except Papa, that I care for nothing in comparison with Papa, that I love him better than myself. that, no! I should never love anybody better than Papa. My affection for him was the chief sentiment in my heart. I trusted him simply because he was my Pa and Pa did not tell falsehoods. Pa has been so good. My thoughts and feelings regarding this matter are in entangled mass. I do not know anymore what is false and what is true.

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posted by Graciana@Home at 6:01 pm

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